Everything changes. And as much as I am excited for the future and ready to be done with whatever is happening in the present, when the future becomes now it always seems to have appeared suddenly, and there's always something good about the soon-to-be past that I realized much too late. We're in the process of moving to a beautiful apartment near Wes' office in Hillsboro. We're climbing on top of eachother in our current one bedroom apartment and our new place is huge: 12 foot faulted ceilings, two big bedrooms, a washer and dryer in the apartment (hallelujah!) We have been talking about an apartment upgrade forever and now it's finally happening.
Our current apartment is literally falling apart. The closet doors are coming off the hinges and a kitchen cupboard fell off in Wes' hands last week. I haven't even gone into the once hospitable management office that repeatedly increases the rent without making improvements to the building. This move could not come at a better time. But... I'm gonna miss this place like crazy. I've been through the biggest changes of my life in this apartment and neighborhood. I found out I was pregnant, went through labor and currently give Seeley baths in that tiny bathroom. I gave birth in the bedroom and spent countless sleepless nights looking out the window trying to guess what time it was. I walked through the apartment complex and through the nearby folf course over and over when Seeley was just born and I couldn't walk much further. I've been to the library and yoga studio down the street more times than I can remember. Leaving this place feels like the end of the "having a new baby and trying to survive phase" which, believe me, I was desprate to leave behind. But now I am and it's just plain sad. But we're settled now. Wes is taking on more work and I'm making time for my own projects as Seeley is becoming more and more of her own person. When we leave those memories will only be in my mind. The new rooms won't carry any of that history, but I have great hopes for the future.
Today Seeley and I sat on the porch and played with the dirt in the potted plants. It was cold but only mildly so and the rain fell in occasional drops. A cloud of rosemary and sage settled around us. Seeley was smiling and laughing and saying "ruff ruff" every time a dog went by. It was magical. And a perfect way to leave this place.
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